Rudy Giuliani—who in a few short years has gone from America’s mayor to Upper Manhattan’s creepy glare—is in the news again. And it’s not because he’s sprung a leak while trying to explain how the ghost of Hugo Chavez picked our president, or even because his newly released Jan. 6 committee transcript is absolutely bananapants. Turns out last week brought the final halcyon days of House Giuliani.
Now Roods is being sued for sexual harassment, which is about as surprising as the least surprising thing you could possibly think of. For anyone who had this on your Rudy Giuliani 2023 bingo card, congratulations! So did everyone else.
While the rest of us have spent the week frantically searching online for speaker of the House roll call drinking games, Rudy apparently needs no such excuse for day drinking. Indeed, you’ll no doubt be shocked to learn that his alleged sexual harassment is also (allegedly) alcohol-related.
In a summons filed this week in New York, Noelle Dunphy, whom Giuliani removed from his employ last year, alleges, “Rudolph W. Giuliani, the former US Attorney, once hailed as ‘America’s Mayor,’ is a sexist sexual predator and abuser.”
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In the summons, Dunphy states that she was retained for “business development work and other work” by Giuliani and his companies in January 2019. During that time, the 43-year-old alleges, Giuliani made frequent racist and antisemitic remarks during “confused and hostile alcohol-laced tirades.” She noted that Giuliani’s alleged “abuse of alcohol” was fueled by his divorce and mounting political and legal controversies.
Of course, I have no idea if Rudy is actually a problem drinker. I’ve merely read the same reports and heard the same rumors as everyone else. I can only confirm that the Keebler elves he hallucinates late at night during spray-on hair infomercials are also suing him for sexual harassment.
Dunphy also alleges that Giuliani “sexually harassed” her and demanded sexual favors until she was fired without substantial compensation in 2021. Giuliani allegedly demanded that Dunphy say nothing about her association with him.
“At these times, Giuliani threatened [Dunphy] with further retaliation if she did not stay silent, stating that his private investigators and political connections to President Trump enabled him to retaliate in other ways, express and implied,” Dunphy wrote in the summons.
So whom to believe? A woman who claims Rudy Giuliani was inappropriate and creepy, or Rudy Giuliani, who specializes in being inappropriate and creepy?
Dunphy also wrote—and, fair warning, this is the grossest thing you’ll see today unless you’re scheduled to do colorectal surgery on feral hogs later—“It began with Rudy as my boss and lawyer and later turned romantic.”
She also stated, “Seeking justice against a powerful man is terrifying. Even many lawyers are intimidated by Rudy, and by the idea of taking him on,” she said. “I can’t be silent any longer.”
Of course, this is still a she said/he slurred story, so Giuliani denies the allegations. His lawyer, Robert Costello, told The Daily Beast, “These are libelous allegations drafted by an individual with no lawyer, because no lawyer would associate themselves with this nonsense. … Unfortunately, when you are in the public eye, you become a target for these predators. Any cursory due diligence will reveal that this person is not truthful and any publication of these lies will be purely malicious on the part of your publication.”
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Exhibit A for the defense is Giuliani’s unimpeachable status as America’s beloved mayor, while this little morsel of alphabet soup is just one argument for the prosecution:
Whom to believe? Dunphy will have her day in court, of course—but the verdict on Rudy came in long ago, and the jury pronounced him creepy AF.
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