Sunday, November 13, 2022

ALDOUS J. PENNYFARTHING: Marjorie Taylor Greene criticizes Paul Pelosi for irresponsibly getting hit in head with a hammer

So homicide rates actually began their recent ascent during the enlightened, benevolent rule of Donald John Trump, the guy who wanted to put down domestic protests by rolling tanks down the streets of our cities. Apparently his tough, no-nonsense approach only caused the murder rate to skyrocket 30% in one year—though Trump superfan Marjorie Taylor Greene would like you to ignore that and direct your ire at people who think elderly spouses of Democratic politicians getting their skulls bashed in by MAGA assailants with hammers is unambiguously a bad thing.

You may have noticed that Trump is holding more Loser-Palooza rallies lately to support his dream of a pliant Congress he can steamroll on the way to absolute, uncontested Trumpian rule. For some reason, Chuck Grassley, who must be close to 90% prostate by this point, is running for his eighth Senate term, and the same people who keep saying Joe Biden is too old to serve are propping him up like PJ and Squee during happy hour at an Ames Applebee’s. And on Thursday night in Sioux City, Iowa, Trump, Greene, and their cavalcade of sundry election deniers, QAnon kooks, and vehement forced birthers were doing their level best to pull Grassley over the finish line one last time. 

And naturally, the Unthinkable Margie Greene really got the orc horde in a lather.

Watch (second tweet):

GREENE: “Americans are robbed, stabbed, raped, kidnapped, carjacked, and murdered, but the only crime victim you hear about from Democrats and the media is Paul Pelosi. [crowd boos] Paul Pelosi was brutally attacked by a drugged-out illegal alien that should have been deported, and Paul Pelosi should have been a gun owner and shot his attacker.”

So how exactly will Greene address crime, which is demonstrably worse in traditionally red states like Georgia than in progressive redoubts like California and New York?

Since foreign-born immigrants commit crimes at a lower rate than the native-born population, letting more of them settle here would likely help lower our crime rate (while also taking a bite out of inflation). But you’ll never hear that common-sense policy prescription from these sad clowns. Stronger gun regulations would also go a long way toward ending gun violence, but that’s clearly a nonstarter with this lot.

Meanwhile, the idea that crime is being driven by newly introduced progressive policies is clearly a canard, as a recent Atlantic essay by Ronald Brownstein made clear:

These [Republican] attacks assume that the changes in criminal-justice policies that some states and many cities have pursued over the past few years are undermining public safety and fueling higher crime rates.

But an exhaustive new study released [Oct. 20] by the Center for American Progress refutes that allegation. Conducted by a team of seven academic researchers, the study compares cities that have elected so-called progressive prosecutors with places whose district attorneys continue to pursue more traditional approaches.

Countering conventional wisdom, the study found that homicides over recent years increased less rapidly in cities with progressive prosecutors than in those with more traditional district attorneys. It also found no meaningful differences between cities with progressive or traditional DAs in the trends for larceny and robbery. 

So what’s MTG’s solution? Paul Pelosi should sleep with a Colt .45 under his pillow. Problem solved!

Of course, expecting anything but nonsense from Greene is like hoping Trump reads a thorough post-mortem of the 2020 presidential election in Penthouse Forum and finally concedes his loss. It won’t happen. But we can help mute these meatheads by, you know, voting on Tuesday!

Republicans can only make crime worse—especially in the halls of Congress and the TV room at the White House. We’re all tired of the screeching from this flaxen-haired fugazi, so let’s do what we can to make her irrelevant. And to keep denying her those coveted committee assignments. You have everything to gain and nothing to lose. Let’s roll!

Just keep those gums flappin', Marjorie.  Nancy is still riding high.

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